How to Be
Medically Compliant and Emotionally Buoyant

 The trick is to re-train your brain - to be smart, to understand your doctors' recommendations, to make wise choices about both what you do AND what you think.

Become your own case manager

 Here are some thoughts on what great case managers do, and how you can you best do this for yourself:

At some point in my relationship to kidney failure and its treatment I realized that I really resented anyone else thinking they knew more about my disease than I did.  I really resented it. So I set out to learn all that a layman could.  I was going to be the expert on my disease, its treatment, and myself.

Now I amend my advice to learning as much as possible about how healthy bodies work.  Too much attention to what's allegedly wrong and what further can go wrong keeps a person's thoughts in a fearful place.  Remember back to the very first paragraph of this article.  Be smart.  Understand the doctor's recommendations.  Make wise choices about both what to do and what to think.

 Work only with doctors you respect, who respect you, and to whom you can talk.  It took me 3 dermatologists before I found one with a sense of humor.  Please! I had already been through dialysis and transplantation.  Treating my skin was no big deal.  Let's lighten up!

 Your doctor should make you feel that she/he has time for you.   Have your questions written in advance.  Know what to report and write that down too.  After all, if you're playing the role of the patient, you're allowed a script.

You don't have to manifest the negative side effects about which you are warned.

How often have you found that the "rules" do not apply to you, that what holds true for most people does not hold true for you?  You don't have to manifest the side effects that most people do.  You don't have to follow statistical trends. You are unique in all the world.  Why not prove it to the doctors through a uniquely easy and successful course of treatment?

Do you know how it feels to be really strong, confident, and powerful?  How do you feel about the decisions you have made when you felt that good, that in control?  Think about what the results of your decisions made from a place of power were.  If you've received medical news that has scared you into feeling powerless, talk to someone who will remind you of the other obstacles you've overcome in your life.  The perfect person to share scary news with is someone who understands that you are frightened, and helps you remember how wonderful and capable you are.

I have had predisone prescribed for me twice as an adult.  I was 22 and scared to death the first time.  I was frightened for my safety, my health, and my future.  I was taking prednisone because it was doctor's orders - "try this it might help."  A very passive position, that episode with prednisone was wrought with nightmares, moodswings, and binge eating.

When I was 25 and had to go on prednisone again.  I more fully understood the reasons why, and I agreed to the course of treatment, from a position of power and knowledge.  I was determined that the drug would serve its purpose and would not riddle me with side effects.  It worked.  Believing in effects without side effects works for me.

There have been many other medications and treatments since then.  The #1 thing I have going for me is my conviction that I get to choose how I react to any situation.  By choosing my reaction I effect the outcome.  You can, too.

Play acting and medical appointments 

Are there some kinds of procedures and places that really raise your anxiety?   I used to freak out about going back to the transplant clinic.  I would have alarmingly high blood pressure at those office visits.  The last thing I wanted was more medical attention in my life, but that's what I got.

Clinic visits caused all kinds of emotional reactions in me. Collecting urine had the bad connotation that they were always looking for something wrong.  I knew I had to turn that around.

What about going in with the attitude that you are going to prove how healthy you are?  What about going in with the intention of having a totally forgettable time with little or no required follow-up.  What about aiming to be one of the boring, yet pleasant, patients?   If you have enough good things going on in other areas of your life you really don't need or want some medical people giving you lots of attention.

So what I've done for the last 3 annual check-ups is to play a character.  The medical staff does not know that in my head I'm saying to myself "What would Florence do?  What would Florence ask?  What would Florence say?"  I chose Florence because she is one of the strongest, healthiest, most gracious women I know.  Florence doesn't have the same sense of humor I do, but she exudes confidence and competence.  Florence does not get rattled easily.  Yes, I still write out my list of questions or complaints.  I report fully, and I listen and pay attention.   I listen and pay attention better when I am playing the role of Florence - unflappable Florence.

Take your pills and affirm your health

I suggest that you learn specifically why you take every medication that you take.  Then as you take it, thank it for doing all the right things to keep you healthy.

I was instructed to drink 3 liters of water a day 13 years ago.  Every time I drink water I still picture it washing my cells and organs, flushing through me like the radiator flushes that I learned about in high school auto shop.  It can't hurt to see it this way and I've got over 13 years of success to say that it probably helps.  Yes, I have a relationship with every person, place and thing in my life.  I'd like to think they are all positive - that everything in my life is here to support my highest purpose.  Staying healthy is just one way of taking extremely good care of myself.

Educate yourself about what your organs and systems are supposed to do.

That's right, learn everything you can about how your body is supposed to work, not the disease process.  Learn about health!

Don't tell everyone you know to worry about you.

It's great to ask people to pray for you, or simply hold a good thought, but don't get their vibes started in a downward spiral about you.  You don't want people to picture you impaired, do you?

The last time I had a health challenge I only told about 5 people, and I specifically asked them to visualize my liver as perfectly pink and fleshy, doing exactly what it should.  I proclaimed myself a "liver lover."  The result was that a biopsy showed none of the suspected cirrhosis!

Getting attention for the non-medical things in your life.

Remember your interests - the last book you read, the last talk you attended, the last wedding you went to.  What flowers are in bloom now? Libraries and walks in the park are still free.  What is the cutest thing your niece has said recently?

What are the pleasantries of your life today?  Share them.  When was the last time you made a new friend?   Know anyone who's having a baby?  Share your wisdom or your wonder.

Who's the most up beat person you know?  Resolve to call them once a week.  Just hearing their voice on their answering machine can be uplifting.  Want to fall in love again?  Many people with medical conditions have done it.

It is possible to live with an intrusive chronic condition, or two, and have a joyful life.  Don't let your health concerns take up more of your thoughts and energy than your pursuit of happiness.  We can train our brains to see the silver linings.  Medical compliance may require us to carry an umbrella, but we can still dance in the puddles.

If you found this of any of my articles interesting and want to have some fun applying these principles to your life give me a call or an email for a no-cost coaching session.

Kate Hannigan (571) 434-8097, coachkth@erols.com